Why The Hell Would You Steal Hairdresser Crap?
That’s my question for Boca Juniors striker Lucas Viatri, who has been charged with stealing from a hairdresser’s shop. And we’re not talking money or fine jewelry here. Tell ‘em, Reuters:
Arturo Olcese [Viatri's lawyer] told Reuters that Viatri, who allegedly stole a pair of scissors and hair spray along with his brother and a friend, has been accused of robbery aggravated by the possession of weapons.
First of all, do three guys really need weapons to steal a pair of scissors and hair spray from a hairdresser? Really? Secondly, why? Just…why? Why would you ever need to do this? Maybe this isn’t so far fetched coming from a dude who wears denim shorts (jorts), but…come on.
It gets nuttier, though. Viatri was held in custody for a month during the preliminary investigation. A whole month in custody for stealing scissors and hair spray! Wow. They must have tacked on a few extra weeks as a penalty for being a stupid, stupid person.
Anyway, once Viatri was released, he returned to Boca Juniors and has actually done quite well, scoring seven goals in just 12 matches this season.
Also: I now have a headache and need to lie down.
BONUS (if you speak Spanish): Here’s a news report on the matter. No idea what they’re saying, but I assume it’s something about Lucas Viatri being dumb..and maybe something about an outbreak of puppy herpes…
Tags: Argentina, armed robbery, Boca Juniors, hairdresser theft, jorts, Lucas Viatri, puppy herpes, stupid stupid people
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