Ronaldo is Old, Fat, Slow, etc.
The most unbelievable thing happened the other day down in Brazil. Corinthians found out that Ronaldo is a fat tub of lard! OMG NO!!!
Seriously, who did not see this one coming? After signing a contract worth millions to play football for Corinthians, Ronaldo doesn’t seem to be the fittest player on the side. Ok, I’ll cut the bull and get right down to brass tacks; he’s the absolute slowest person on the team:
The former Milan and Real Madrid striker offered no encouraging signs during Saturday’s fitness session as he struggled, and came last out of the 28 squad members during resistance and speed work exercises.
Ronaldo has been trying hard though, but there is still plenty of work to be done if he is to make a quick return to the pitch.
The hit-man was clearly in difficulty as he came up against his leaner teammates.
His fitness coach Flavio De Oliveira knows the results are not good, but he is still harbouring some hope for the player’s future fitness.
“We always knew Ronaldo wouldn’t fare as good as the other players,” De Oliveira is quoted as saying in Il Corriere Dello Sport.
“However, he will get better with time and we are sure of this. “He just needs plenty of training to recover from his injury.”
Yeaaah, all he needs is time guys. Like all that time he spent training with Flamengo and “rehabbing” his injuries. Just a few more decades of that and he will be set to tear it up. Trust me. And the fact that Corinthians “knew Ronaldo wouldn’t fare as good as the other players,” then proceeded to sign him to a fat deal is all semantics. After all, he’s RONALDO! O FENOMENO!! Duh.
Although he didn’t fair too well in that fitness race or whatever, a DT insider at Corinthians told me that after the training session, Ronaldo organized a powdered donut eating contest to prove his worth to his teammates and coaches. He went on to smash everyone, practically drinking 17 powdered donuts in under a minute. When he slowly rose to proclaim his glory, he was slightly perturbed to see that no one was impressed. He then left to go get McDonalds. ‘Cus he was hungry.
[Source: Goal.com]
Tags: Being Washed Up, Corinthians, Powdered Donuts, Ronaldo
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January 5th, 2009 at 12:46 am
Slow and old Ronaldo in the pic above looks a little bit like Adam Sandler. Do you agree?
January 5th, 2009 at 1:04 am
Ha! You’re right. I wonder if he talks to giant penguins, too.
June 3rd, 2009 at 2:28 am
Ronaldo is Ronaldo!! He is the king of comebacks and will make all who call him fat, eat humble pie!