The Football Ego Rich List
FourFourTwo released their annual Football Rich List, detailing the wealthiest individuals in the game based on monetary standards, but sometimes one’s self worth far exceeds quantifiable currency. With that in mind, here are the 10 most ego rich people in the game today.
10. Dean Windass
Read his Tuesday column for ITV and tell me the man doesn’t have a massive ego. It can’t be more than 300 words long, but it is so dripping with deluded self importance and bitterness that you can almost hear him playing a pitiful violin solo for himself as you read it. Seriously, read it right now and just try not to punch the picture of him that accompanies the column.
On a related note, my computer screen is now cracked.
9. Dimitar Berbatov
Come on — he’s…The Continental…what more reason do you need?
8. Zlatan Ibrahimovic
When both were playing at Juventus, Ibra told future Golden Boot winner Fabio Cannavaro, “‘You won the league at 30 years of age thanks to me. Before that you hadn’t won anything.” Even joking around, that’s a dick thing to say to your team’s captain.
But his antics aren’t restricted to the club level. When Zlatan and two Swedish national teammates were suspended for breaking curfew, he was not only the lone member of the trio to deny wrongdoing, but also went so far as to boycott Sweden’s next three World Cup Qualifiers in a pouty protest.
7. Didier Drogba
There are plenty of reasons why Drogs belongs on this list, but the one that simply cannot be topped is the story of how he spent thousands of pounds last season buying up shirts with his own name on the back in an effort to prove he was the most popular player on the Chelsea team. Employees of the club shop ratted him out, saying he was by far their best customer, sometimes leaving with 40 shirts that he would send to his friends back in Africa as gifts. How he figured this would prove anything but how vain he is, I will never know.
6. William Gallas
When he played for Chelsea, he said it was “a living hell” and that “Chelsea’s owners had disappointed me, they have not realised what I’m worth.” Then, when he got his wish and was transferred to Arsenal, he ends up publicly questioning his teammates’ heart and getting his captaincy taken away. Simply put, the man is a plague who thinks he’s a pleasure.
5. Silvio Berlusconi
Owner of AC Milan, Italian Prime Minister, writer of love songs, Silvio Berlusconi really does do it all. In fact, you might find it difficult to compare him to someone who has achieved as much as he has, but luckily, he can save the day even on that one:
“I am the Jesus Christ of politics. I am a patient victim, I put up with everyone, I sacrifice myself for everyone.”
Comparing yourself to Jesus. That’ll do it. But Berlusconi doesn’t just see himself as a savior to mankind, but womankind, too. Ahead of a meeting with Finnish president Tarja Halonen, he said had to “dust off my playboy skills” in order to convince her to base the EFSA in Parma.
So, yeah, the man sees himself as a Playboy Jesus. His spot here is well earned.
4. Antonio Cassano
With the release of his recent autobiography, the world was able to see the full extent of how fantastic the Sampdoria striker thinks he is. Whether it’s claiming to have slept with 600-700 women (20 of whom were in show business…he actually specified that), claiming he needed to be a millionaire for another eight years so that his life would be evened out between wealth and squalor, or admitting that he used to bet on his own team in order to make extra money off his own performances, Cassano has a whole book full of reasons why he deserves to be right here.
3. Maradona
The man has his own cult, for God’s sake! Beyond that, we all know there are a plethora of reasons why the Argentina manager is raging egomaniac, so let’s not waste our time.
2. Cristiano Ronaldo
“If I am named the best in the world, it won’t be a surprise to me,” he said before winning the Ballon d’Or. “I am like Hercules,” he said after winning the Ballon d’Or.
Also: Just look at any picture of him ever taken.
1. Jose Mourinho
He had it at “I think I’m a special one,” but he sealed it with: “If I wanted to have an easy job… I would have stayed at Porto - beautiful blue chair, the Uefa Champions League trophy, God, and after God, me.” In other words, while Berlusconi compares himself to Jesus, Jose puts himself ahead of Jesus on the heavenly totem pole.
Yes, we have a winner.
Tags: Antonio Cassano, Cristiano Ronaldo, Dean Windass, Didier Drogba, Dimitar Berbatov, Ego, Jose Mourinho, Maradona, Silvio Berlusconi, William Gallas, Zlatan Ibrahimovic
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