The AFC U-16 Championship brings us both the greatest goalkeeper goal and worst goalkeeper attempt at a save in the same moment. Uzbekistan beat North Korea 3-1 thanks in part to Jasurbek Umrzakov scoring from inside his own box because his North Korean counterpart Jang “Definitely Not Manuel Neuer” Paek-ho suffered from a bout of spontaneous insanity.
Category: Asia
Godzilla attempts penalty with tail before J-League match, fails
To promote the upcoming release of Godzilla Resurgence in Japan, a person in a Godzilla costume attempted a penalty with its tail before a J-League match between Kawasaki Frontale and FC Toyko over the weekend. With Kawasaki Frontale’s dolphin mascot in goal, the spinning tail-whip shot failed, leaving the job up to co-star Hiroki Hasegawa to put the ball in the net.
Demba Ba most concerned about Shanghai Shenhua result after career threatening leg break
Demba Ba followed the money to the Chinese Super League in 2015 and has scored 29 goals in 37 appearances for Shanghai Shenhua since. During a match against Shanghai SIPG on Sunday, Ba suffered a horrific leg break (that we will not be showing here, because it’s awful) — an injury his manager fears could end his career.
And yet, Ba’s first question after enduring this unfathomable pain reportedly wasn’t about his leg and contradicts the “mercenary” tag players who go to the Chinese Super League are saddled with. From Football365:
Ba was rushed to hospital and placed under general anaesthesia, awaking four hours later in considerable pain.
According to medical staff, the first question the 31-year-old asked: “Did we win the game?”
They did (2-1). I’m not sure if this is proof of Ba’s commitment to the club or the quality of those hospital drugs, though.
Flood waters fill Chinese stadium like a swimming pool
Devastating floods have killed more than 180 people in China, according to the BBC, causing widespread damage in the Guizhou and Hubei provinces. Mingtang Stadium in the city of Ezhou was affected in surreal fashion as the torrential rains filled the football ground like a giant above-ground swimming pool.
Japanese clubs to wear kits with dog and eagle faces on them
Japanese second division club JEF United Ichihara Chiba are celebrating their 25th anniversary with a legends match against Tokyo Verdy and both clubs will wear special kits that should make goal celebrations a little extra enjoyable.
Malaysian footballer proves he is a sorcerer with swerving free kick
Everything we know about science has been rendered meaningless with one free kick from the Malaysian Super League. Penang midfielder Faiz Subri scored from considerable distance with a shot that might have opened up a wormhole to another dimension as it swerved into the goal.
This goal raises many important questions like “Is magic allowed in football?” and “Do we have to make Faiz Subri king of the planet now before he smites us all with his swerving free kicks?”
Be afraid.
Xavi might be cursed
Xavi left Barcelona at the end of last season having won more trophies than any other Spanish footballer in history. He could have retired as a one-club legend and gone out with a treble-winning season, but he chose to follow the money to Qatar and join Al Sadd on a multi-year deal.
Chinese Super League clubs paying big money for prime talent because they can
Chinese Super League clubs have used the winter transfer window to break Asian spending records on a near daily basis. And unlike most other leagues outside the European elite looking for rapid growth, they’re doing it by snagging valuable players in their primes from top clubs rather than stars pushing back retirement or young unknowns from South American leagues.
Luiz Adriano went all the way to China to not sign a contract
Just six months after moving to Milan in an €8 million deal, Luiz Adriano was the subject of a €14 million agreement between Milan and Jiangsu Suning. With Chinese Super League clubs throwing around increasingly ridiculous sums of money for seemingly random players, this development wasn’t all that surprising, especially since Milan are developing a habit of quickly unloading strikers who don’t immediately meet expectations.
8-year-old Japanese boy sings Barca anthem at club’s training session, melts your heart
Barcelona have arrived in Japan for the Club World Cup and eight-year-old Koshiro Yamashita welcomed them by belting out the club’s anthem at a training session while standing in the middle of a group of children. It was so adorable that it probably made Gerard Pique spontaneously bleed everywhere.
Koshiro did a truly spectacular job of confidently leading the clapping kids in the tune and was rewarded for his efforts with a special badge by the club’s vice president.
They probably would’ve brought him back to Spain to lead the singing at the Camp Nou, but FIFA had to go and crack down on their underage transfers.