Tag: Luis Suarez

Luis Suarez doesn’t want footballers talking about all the things he does to them on the pitch

Following a challenge that left his opponent with a bloody hole in his foot, Luis Suarez reportedly shouted “You dived, clown!” at Atletico Madrid’s Filipe Luis. Shortly after the match, Luis shared a photo of the damage Suarez did to his foot on Instagram, along with the caption “At least he didn’t touch me!”

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Lionel Messi passes penalty to Luis Suarez for audacious goal

At a certain point, anything can get a bit boring. When you’re Lionel Messi and you’re up 3-1 against Celta Vigo in the 80th minute, you’ve reached one of those times where taking a penalty as one normally does just feels a bit bland. So instead of shooting from the spot, you lay off a pass to Luis Suarez to confound the goalkeeper, blow the minds of everyone watching and get your teammate his hat trick. That, my friends, is the mark of genius.

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Luis Suarez bought Lionel Messi dwarf pajamas

Lionel Messi posted on Instagram to thank teammate Luis Suarez for sending him a gift, which apparently was a pair of pajamas that read “I hate mornings” and feature Grumpy from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. We can’t be sure why Suarez did this (even Messi himself writes that he doesn’t quite understand), other than the fact that it’s perfect and wonderful.

This almost makes the international break worthwhile. OK, no it doesn’t.

DTotD: Chile’s Gonzalo Jara gets Edinson Cavani sent off with a bad touch

Chile beat defending Copa America champions Uruguay 1-0 in an expectedly feisty quarterfinal match. With Luis Suarez unavailable to lead everyone down the path of anarchy, the responsibility fell to everyone else. And in the 62nd minute, Edinson Cavani was shown a second yellow for slapping Chile’s Gonzalo Jara in the face.

But what the referee and the initial camera angle didn’t catch was where Jara’s hand was before Cavani slapped him…

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Luis Suarez scores Champions League winner, Andrea Pirlo cries

Because this is real life, the winning goal of the 2015 Champions League final was scored by a serial biter coming off a four month ban from all footballing activities for a team with a long impending transfer ban, leading a universally beloved figure to cry in front of the whole world. In other words, Luis Suarez scored the decisive goal in Barcelona’s 3-1 win against Juventus.

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Giorgio Chiellini showing first symptoms of Suarezitis

Juventus held on for a scoreless draw in the second leg of their Champions League quarterfinal against Monaco to advance on a 1-0 aggregate, but amidst the celebrations is deep concern. Early in the match, defender Giorgio Chiellini displayed his first symptom of Suarezitis, which he contracted when Luis Suarez bit him at last summer’s World Cup.

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