EVERYTHING IS FINE—YOU REMEMBER NOTHING
Tag: Serie A
Francesco Totti had a weird idea for his final match with Roma
It’s a good thing they weren’t awarded a penalty with him on the pitch
A lot of thought and planning went into Francesco Totti’s final match with Roma, but according to teammate Juan Jesus, the captain kept changing his mind on the decision in the days leading up to his farewell. He even formulated an insane strategy if he had the chance to take a penalty in the match.
From ESPN FC:
“He was nervous all week,” Jesus told Porto Alegre-based station Radio Atlantida. “One day he would say, ‘I’m quitting,’ and the next he would be, ‘I’m going to keep playing.’ Before Roma-Genoa, we all got together in the dressing room and he said, ‘If I get a penalty, I won’t score it, I’ll kick the ball into the Curva [Sud].’
“There wasn’t a penalty so instead he sent an autographed ball into the Curva after the game. Totti is a fantastic person and he deserves far more than just that party. He’s somebody who helps those in need a lot, without anybody needing to know about it.”
Now, it’s important to remember that this match had serious implications for Roma behind Totti’s sendoff. They were still battling Napoli for second place in Serie A and an automatic place in the Champions League group stage. They only won that decisive match against Genoa by a 3–2 margin on a Diego Perotti goal in the 90th minute. So Totti blasting a penalty into the stands in this situation would’ve been absolutely bananas.
And people thought John Terry orchestrating a guard of honor upon his substitution in the 26th minute of his final (far less meaningful) match was crazy.
Pescara president to leave club after angry fans torch two of his cars
How’s he supposed to leave when all of his cars are destroyed?
Pescara sit dead last in the Serie A table with just nine points and one win (given to them because Sassuolo fielded an ineligible player) to their credit. Though the club only finished fourth in Serie B last season and won promotion through the six-team playoff, some supporters expected more of this season and they’re blaming club president Daniele Sebastiani. And so they went to his house in the middle of the night and set two of his cars on fire. As you do.
It seems the arson has had it’s desired effect, too. From the AP:
Sebastiani told regional daily Il Centro: “I’m outraged, at the end of the year I’m leaving the club.”
This comes after fans jeered players as their arrived for their annual holiday party back in December, which came shortly after a loss to Crotone. According to ESPNFC, the supporters spat and kicked at players’ cars, prompting Sebastiani to say “Football is not war, it’s a game.” It seems he underestimated their fury.
Francesco Totti scores late winner, makes young fan cry tears of joy
A little more than two weeks away from his 40th birthday, Francesco Totti hasn’t been given many chances to make an impact for Roma, but after coming off the bench at halftime against Sampdoria, he led his side to a comeback victory capped off by his stoppage time penalty (see the goal here). It was a moment that had fans weeping with joy, showing just how much they love this man.
Torino list Joe Hart as “John Hart” on team sheet for his debut
It wasn’t the best Serie A debut for Joe Hart, as his club, Torino, lost 2-1 to Atalanta. Hart failed to control a corner kick, in the 56th minute, gifting Atalanta with an equalizer just two minutes after Torino opened the scoring. Then, in the 82nd minute, Atalanta scored a winner from the penalty spot.
The shaky start to his season-long loan abroad can be blamed on a “John Hart” though, as that’s the name Torino listed on their team sheet.
DT Exclusive: Why Marcelo Bielsa quit Lazio after two days
The enigmatic Marcelo Bielsa quit as Lazio manager just two days after the club officially announced his arrival. This obviously did not please Lazio, as they are now threatening legal action against the Argentine even though they promptly announced Simone Inzaghi (Pippo’s younger brother) would replace him.
For his part, Bielsa says “After four weeks working together with you, we could not sign any of the seven additions in the work program expressly approved by the President Claudio Lotito.” He adds that the club agreed to sign at least four of those players by July 5, but that didn’t happen, either. “For my style of work we needed to have these players arrive in a timely manner to train,” he concludes.
This, however, was not the offense that sent Bielsa over the edge. The following is a transcript of the conversation that ended his 48-hour reign.
Crotone to intimidate Serie A with terrifying shark person statue
Calabrian side Crotone FC have won promotion to Serie A for the first time in their history, so to prepare for their new challenge, they have unveiled an unsettling statue of a half shark, half man footballer that will surely strike fear into the hearts of all their opponents.
The club’s nickname is the Sharks (Squali), so there is some inspiration for this creature other than the effects of hallucinogenic drugs.
Francesco Totti might regret his decision to play another season with Roma when he meets this thing.
Luca Toni chips in a penalty during his final match, retires like a boss
World Cup winner Luca Toni went out in pretty much the best way a guy on a relegated team could hope by audaciously chipping in a penalty and beating Serie A champions Juventus 2-1. The 38-year-old striker, who was Serie A’s top scorer as recently as last season, executed the Panenka that sparked cheers from both sets of fans in the 43rd minute before doing his signature celebration for the last time.
This is what it’s come to for Mario Balotelli
A missed penalty against Frosinone brings Mario Balotelli to 16 straight appearances without a goal. Once automatic from the penalty spot, even Balotelli’s greatest strength seems to have disappeared as he has only scored one Serie A goal for Milan all season.
DTotD: Paul Pogba taken down by champagne slicked floor
That moment when you get a little carried away with the celebrations… #Hi5tory pic.twitter.com/W81tiOJtcZ
— JuventusFC (@juventusfcen) April 25, 2016
Juventus sealed their record fifth consecutive Serie A title with Roma’s 1-0 win over Napoli, prompting the usual celebrations of bouncing around while spraying champagne. But since the players were in a room with a hardwood floor instead of the dressing room, this created hazardous conditions. And Paul Pogba fell victim to them.
While attempting to take a selfie while moshing around, Pogba slipped on the wet floor, then looked like he was trying to walk on ice as he attempted to get back to his feet.
This is a video that likely gave France manager Didier Deschamps a heart attack so close to Euro 2016, but Pogba appeared to survive the ordeal without any ill effects.
This has been the Dirty Tackle of the Day: a chronicling of unfortunate events.