Author: Brooks Peck

Willian breaks the mirror on an Audi during promotional shoot

Earlier this season, Willian told the press that he and Jose Mourinho agreed that he needs to score more goals. Though he’s only been able to match his total of four from last season thus far, he has now surpassed his previous career high for Audi sideview mirrors broken during promotional shoots. So that’s something.

Several Chelsea players were attempting to kick balls into strategically placed Audi TT roadsters and in a tremendous display of his pinpoint accuracy (or lack thereof), Willian busted the driver’s side mirror of one car. His teammates laughed and Loic Remy tried to fix it, but the damage was done.

Though he did get the ball into the car, something tells me that the next time Audi have Chelsea players do something for them, they’ll ask Willian to stay home.

A West Ham fan threw a mangled ear of corn on the pitch

West Ham held a 1-0 lead against Stoke from the seventh minute all the way until the fifth minute of added time, when Marko Arnautovic equalized to salvage a point at Upton Park. For one West Ham supporter, there was only one possible response to this type of frustration: throwing an ear of sweet corn, that may or may not have been partially eaten, onto the pitch.

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Liverpool unveil new 2015/16 home kit that all TRUE fans will buy

Liverpool have unveiled their new home kit for the 2015/16 season. Though this one carries the badge of Warrior parent company New Balance for the first time, it’s still red. Some people might say that the shirt is indistinguishable from every other Liverpool home shirt ever made and isn’t worth paying £50 for, but those people aren’t real fans.

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Luis Suarez blames bite victims Ivanovic and Chiellini for being “irritating”

Just in case you weren’t convinced that Luis Suarez is completely devoid of the ability to take responsibility for his own actions, his latest comments on his bite victims should clear that up. According to Suarez, Branislav Ivanovic and Giorgio Chiellini deserve blame for being bitten by him since they were annoying. Victim blaming ahoy!

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Confrontational Aston Villa ball boy rolls ball between Rob Green’s legs

Ball boys are the worst. Jose Mourinho knows it, Cristiano Ronaldo knows it, and now QPR goalkeeper Rob Green does too.

During QPR’s 3-3 draw at Aston Villa, Green relied on a ball boy behind his goal to do his job and retrieve a ball. But on, his way to it, the ball boy slipped and fell on his backside, but tried to recover by kicking the ball to Green instead of tossing it. Unsurprisingly, Green couldn’t handle it and the ball rolled back towards the advertising hoardings again. This time, the ball boy tried to big-time Green by faking the handoff and then rolling it between the goalkeeper’s legs from handshake distance.

Granted, putting the ball past Rob Green is something many people have done over the years, but this proves yet again that ball boys are a cruel breed.

Previously — Conspiracy Theory: Ball boy cabal determined to sabotage Chelsea

Mario Balotelli is Instagramming his sick notes now

A photo posted by Mario Balotelli (@mb459) on

Four days after missing Liverpool’s disastrous trip to London (where they lost 4-1 to Arsenal) with minor training ground injury, Mario Balotelli also skipped their trip to Blackburn for the FA Cup quarterfinal replay. Though a Philippe Coutinho goal was enough to send Liverpool to Wembley and a semifinal date with Aston Villa, Balo’s absence was enough for yet another pundit to criticize him.

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Thai player scores gorgeous Olimpico goal, celebrates like Cristiano Ronaldo

Buriram United defender Theerathon Bunmathan scored his side’s first goal in their 2-1 AFC Champions League win against Gamba Osaka directly from a corner kick. If anything earns the right to mimic Cristiano Ronaldo’s signature goal celebration, it’s this. So Bunmathan followed his perfect goal with his celebratory tribute.

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