A few years ago, a Spanish third division club gained international attention by launching a broccoli themed away kit. The idea came from the fact that broccoli was one of the region’s top exports (excessive drug use was probably a major factor too). Well, now the kitmaker that brought you La Hoya Lorca’s “Clockwork Broccoli” kit has a new food based offering for CD Guijuelo: the ham kit.
Zlatan Ibrahimovic has been teasing his first cologne for months and now it has a commercial to push the excitement for the new product into a surreal new dimension. I’m not entirely sure what’s happening in this video, but I’m pretty sure this is what you see when you drink an entire bottle of the Zlatan fragrance.
Going into the UEFA Super Cup against Sevilla, Barcelona showed all the makings of another apocalyptic crisis from which they will never recover. Neymar had to go into quarantine with mumps, Pedro was held out of the starting XI amidst his prolonged transfer saga with Manchester United, and the club hadn’t won a major trophy since the Champions League final last season.
This is what it’s like living with a footballer! / Esto es vivir con un futbolista! https://t.co/KFdh3gY14j
— Shakira (@shakira) August 10, 2015
Shakira posted this video to Twitter as confirmation that living with Gerard Pique is exactly as dangerous as you think it is. But to be fair, nine out of the 10 times he does this, the ball probably bounces off the wall and smacks him in the face. In other words, Shakira probably has to deal with her husband’s self-inflicted bleeding a lot.
This has been the Dirty Tackle of the Day: a chronicling of unfortunate events.
Human embodiment of evil Raheem Sterling took a break from constantly using hippy crack and lending his Mercedes to people just so they could crash it to make his Premier League debut for Manchester City in their 3-0 win at West Brom.
Charleroi’s Javier Martos fell down and slammed both his ass and his head against the pitch during a match against Brugge in Belgium, so the physio came out with his magic spray gun. Except instead of soothing the player’s head, Martos bent over and got a long blast of magic spray down the back of his shorts.
Oxford City wasted no time in equalizing after Chelmsford City took a 2-1 lead in the second half of a National League South match, scoring directly from the ensuing kick off.
Making his debut for Oxford City, Grenada international Bradley Bubb laced a perfect shot between the crossbar and the goalkeeper’s outstretched hand before many Chelmsford players even knew the match had been restarted.
That proved to be the final goal of the match, because how can you top that?
The New York Red Bulls hosted their new prefabricated rivals NYCFC on Sunday and, as rivals are supposed to do, the home fans gave their opponents a bit of ribbing.
Despite being the victim of a vast conspiracy involving everyone from referees to ball boys, Jose Mourinho still led Chelsea to their third Premier League title together and first since his return to the club. Naturally, attempts to destroy someone do not end simply because they fail. Instead, they in scope and complexity. And after the first match of the season, this is already evident.
After spending more than £70 million (so far) this summer, Manchester United’s most important signing and much discussed mystery striker revealed himself to be returning club legend Own Goal, who scored the winner against Spurs at Old Trafford to open the new season on a positive note.