David Luiz scored an important and unexpected goal, helping his team advance to the quarterfinals of the Champions League despite being a man down for 90 minutes. Naturally, he celebrated that goal, expressing the pure joy that we all chase, but experience far too rarely. And since this all happened to occur while he was facing his former club and doing so in their stadium, he ended up apologizing for his celebration. Because we live in a miserable world where people feel compelled to apologize for expressions of happiness.
Tag: Dirty Tackle
Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s player ratings: Chelsea Babies v PSG
Zlatan Ibrahimovic was harshly sent off 31 minutes into the second leg of the Chelsea-PSG Champions League round of 16 tie for a 50-50 challenge with Oscar. Despite being reduced to 10 men, PSG pushed a lackluster Chelsea side to extra time, where they recovered from going a goal down to advance on away goals.
After the match, Zlatan said, “The worst is when I get the red card, all the Chelsea players come around — that, for me, I don’t know, it felt like I had 11 babies around me.”
Boca Juniors celebrate Dani Osvaldo’s first goal with group photo
Argentine-born Italian striker Dani Osvaldo scored his first two goals for Boca Juniors (his fourth club in two years) in their Copa Libertadores match against Zamora. Boca were already up 3-0 when Osvaldo scored his first goal in the 69th minute, so to commemorate the occasion, he and his teammates all ran to the touchline so a member of the club’s staff could take a group photo before the match could continue.
Manuel Neuer hangs out in the center circle during Champions League match
“Hallo, @Manuel_Neuer! Schön, dass du mich mal wieder besuchen kommst. Viele Grüße, dein Mittelkreis.” #FCBFCSD 4-0 pic.twitter.com/ttfy1Ci3DN
— FC Bayern München (@FCBayern) March 11, 2015
Shakhtar Donetsk’s Olexandr Kucher earned the fastest red card in Champions League history in the third minute of his side’s round of 16 second-leg match against Bayern Munich. So Bayern took this as an unnecessary invitation to run wild, scoring seven goals over the next 84 minutes of play. And with Shakhtar pinned back, Bayern goalkeeper Manuel Neuer took the opportunity to play his favorite position: anywhere he wants.
Bayern’s official Twitter account then wrote Neuer a message from his old friend, the center circle. It reads: “Hello, Manuel Neuer! I’m glad to see that you’ve come to visit me again. Many greetings, The Center Circle.”
An evening in exile with Radamel Falcao
A mere 24 hours after serving as an unused substitute in Manchester United’s FA Cup loss to Arsenal (their first loss at home to Arsenal since 2006), Falcao started in a U-21 match against Spurs at Old Trafford. It wasn’t the manner in which a club usually has an on-loan player earn his £260,000 a week, but it does show the brand of anarchy currently gripping Man United.
The following is a rundown of what happened in this depressingly star-studded U-21 fixture.
Cristiano Ronaldo scored twice against Schalke, was still miserable at full time
Cristiano Ronaldo scored not one, but two equalizing goals in the second leg of Real Madrid’s Champions League tie against Schalke, making him the first Real Madrid player to score more than 40 goals across all competitions five seasons in a row. But even with all that, and Real Madrid advancing to the next round, Ronaldo still looked like he just watched Lionel Messi’s son draw a picture of The Rock kissing Irina Shayk on the side of the Cristiano Ronaldo museum at full time.
Borussia Dortmund start “No beer for racists” campaign
Borussia Dortmund have distributed one million “No beer for racists” coasters to local pubs and restaurants as part of campaign to fight the city’s sizable neo-Nazi scene. According to the club, the idea behind the campaign is to reach the places were “football is experienced most intensely outside the stadium” to spread the word that “Borussia, beer — and Nazis? That does not fit!”
BBC match reporter fills in for injured linesman
Matt Mesiano was in attendance at the Conference South match between Hemel Hempstead Town and Bath City last weekend as a reporter for BBC Three Counties Radio, but ended the match as a linesman.
Lionel Messi’s monopolization of football’s records must be stopped
Records are an important part of sports. They provide a context that links the past and present, giving younger generations a means to appreciate what came before their time. They allow the names of legends to live on beyond the confines of their brief careers. And by monopolizing football’s records, Lionel Messi is destroying everything.
Paderborn goalkeeper gets obliterated by shot to the face
Down 1-0 to Bayer Leverkusen in the 79th minute, Paderborn goalkeeper Lukas Kruse wasn’t having a great day, but it got a whole lot worse when he was laid out by a Stefan Kiessling shot to the face. The close-range shot appeared to take a deflection off a defender’s boot, leaving Kruse unable to adjust in time and turning the event into something out of a Call of Duty game.
Kruse was flat on his back for a bit, but did get back up and finish out the match. Sadly, having a face that felt like it was stung by a thousand bees didn’t help his cause and Bayer’s Son Heung-Min went on to score twice before the final whistle, giving Bayer a 3-0 win.