A scene from Bond 24…
Vincent Tan: You are powerless against me, Mr. Bond. I have taken control of MI6 and changed the dress code for you and your colleagues to require that you all wear sleeveless T-shirts with bedazzled dragons on them during working hours. Mwahahahaha!
Bond: You’ll never get away with this, Tan. There will be protests! Your reputation will be destroyed.
Tan: Hahaha! Protests and reputations, Mr. Bond? These matters don’t concern me in the slightest. All I care about it getting exactly what I want. And all I want is to enforce my will upon you and anyone else who stands in my way. Mwahahaha!
Madam Low Siew Beng: Tan Dato’ Seri Vincent Tan Chee Yioun! What do you think you’re doing in here?
Tan: Ugh. Nothing, mother.
Madam Low Siew Beng: Are you making enemies again? What have I told you about that?
Tan: (rolls eyes) That togetherness and unity and happiness are the most important things in life and we must always work towards those ideals.
Madam Low Siew Beng: So what are you going to do now?
Madam Low Siew Beng: (expresses parental disappointment by not doing anything at all)
Tan: Fine…I’ll let Mr. Bond wear whatever he wants and release a statement in which I paraphrase John F. Kennedy on the importance of compromise.
Madam Low Siew Beng: And?
Tan: And I’ll get him something to drink because he’s my guest and he’s probably thirsty. YOU’RE A WONDERFUL MOTHER AND I LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU WILL EVER KNOW BUT I WISH YOU WOULD LET ME DISREGARD THE DESIRES OF OTHERS JUST ONE TIME!
In a shocking reversal and show of thoughtful humility from a man widely regarded to be the sporting world’s living caricature of a stereotypical baddie, Cardiff City owner Vincent Tan has decided to change his club’s home kit from red back to blue after two years of protests from Cardiff supporters. And this is all happening because of his mother.
Tan announced the change in one of the most surreal official statements from a football club owner of all time. It begins:
The Christmas and New Year period has given me time to reflect on the events of the last year. Spending time with my family had a profound effect upon me. My mother, Madam Low Siew Beng, a devout Buddhist, who attended Cardiff City Football Club to watch them play, spoke to me on the importance of togetherness, unity and happiness.
From there, Tan announced a welcomed set of changes for the club. But only after paraphrasing John Kennedy.
The statement eventually concludes with the photograph of Tan and his mother at the top of this post.
Moms are power.