Gonzalo Higuain, Destroyer of Dreams, strikes again

With Chile and Argentina scoreless in the Copa America final, Gonzalo Higuain, a man who will never be confused with King Midas, replaced Kun Aguero in the 74th minute. Carlos Tevez, meanwhile, remained on the bench. This proved to be a huge, huge mistake.

In case you need a reminder, this is what Higuain did in the World Cup final, which Argentina went on to lose in extra time, less than a year ago:

And during injury time against Chile, Higuain had another chance to be a national hero. But again, he blew it.

The match then went to extra time, and finally penalties. Now, Higuain missed four of the seven penalties he took in Serie A last season. That’s more than half. And yes, that is apparently possible for someone who is not legally blind.

Given that, Higuain should have been at the very end of the penalty taking order, behind the goalkeeper, ball boy, and any inanimate objects that could be moved onto pitch. Instead, he went second. SECOND. And he blasted his shot into another dimension BECAUSE OF COURSE HE DID.

Higuain wasn’t Argentina’s only penalty disaster, though. Ever Benega went next for them and had his shot saved (but at least he put it on frame), allowing Chile to win the Copa America for the first time ever.

So for the second consecutive tournament, Argentina lost in the final by a slim margin and for the second straight tournament, Lionel Messi, who converted Argentina’s only penalty in shootout, was sad.

At this point, Messi has to be wishing he opted to play for Spain instead of Argentina. Not because he doesn’t love his country, but just to get the hell away from Gonzalo Higuain.


  1. centrbac45 says:

    Brooks, I’ll have to correct you on Pipita’s national hero status. He’s certainly not ours in Argentina, but I’m pretty sure he is in both Germany and Chile now.

  2. Yes, the penalty miss was a horrible shank. But asking him to get that goal in injury time is a bit much. You could say he should have been in a better position, but the shot from where he was was not a simple one.

  3. PleasyReasy says:

    The slow realization on messi’s face that they were going to lose on penalties. It wasn’t sadness, or anger, or bitterness. It was sheer disappointment.

    He was looking like his son had let him down in the worst way.

  4. Jose says:

    Oh well, at least Messi won the 2008 Olympic Gold medal with them along with the highly coveted FIFA World Youth Championship in 2005!

  5. The Caretaker says:

    Only Messi, Di Maria and Masche are world class players for Argentina, and DiMaria is a punk who didn’t even play in the WC final due to some mystery injury and then punked out again last weekend because his leg hurt. Messi and Masche dragged these ingrates again to another final and again Higuain misses a sitter. It makes my heart hurt.

  6. Bowler AA says:

    higuain just done it a third time,i mean seriuosly after putting his hand in the fire and getting burnt wouldnt he realize not to put his ball on the flames this time

    what a compleat plonker

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