We haven’t heard much from our old friend Dimitar Berbatov (a.k.a. …The Continental…) since he joined Greek club PAOK last summer. He’s scored five goals in 19 appearances, but he was also shown his first red card in 14 years for elbowing an opponent in the head after coming off the bench on Sunday. So, naturally, he has followed this incident up by interviewing himself for his Facebook page. Seriously. This is something he has actually done for real.
This is it. The most adorable use for the Champions League trophy imaginable. We can only hope that UEFA sees a chance at monetization here and starts producing replica Champions League trophy baby carrying devices for the common parent.
The “crazy days” of Cologne’s carnival season are approaching, so the club broke out the special kit they unveiled back in October for their match against Stuttgart. The players weren’t the only ones in festive gear, though.
Arsenal found a way to lose to Chelsea yet again, extending their scoreless streak in league matches against the Blues to over nine hours in the process. An 18th-minute Per Mertesacker red card and a 23rd-minute Diego Costa goal proved too much for them to overcome, even though Chelsea made it look like it was 10v10 in the second half. Given this near even battle between a club having a terrible season and a club that only plays like they are when they get too close to first place, we had to ask “What if it continued?”
Well, Dele Alli just did this in Spurs’ 3-1 win at Crystal Palace…
Liverpool won 5-4 at Norwich on an Adam Lallana goal in the fifth minute of added time after the home side equalized in the second minute of added time. It was a match that will go down as one of the best of the season and Jurgen Klopp celebrated as such, getting right in the middle of the Liverpool players’ celebratory mosh pit.
Of course, as anyone who wears glasses will tell you, this was never going to end well for his spectacles. And it didn’t. A flailing Christian Benteke hand accidentally knocked Klopp’s glasses off his face, breaking them in the process.
The thought of a child betraying the family allegiances to support the same clubs as his school chums is too much to bear for some parents. As a result, one Arsenal fan who found himself in this position went so far as to forge a letter from Arsene Wenger in a desperate bid to win back his son.
Javier Mascherano was given a suspended sentence of one year in prison and a fine of €815,000 after pleading guilty to tax evasion in Spain. According to the Telegraph, “prison sentences for under two years in Spain can be suspended in exchange for a fine, so long as the crime is non-violent and the perpetrator has no previous convictions, and the Argentine is not expected to serve any time in jail.”
The state attorney has yet to agree to this sentence, however, so while they await that decision, the two sides have met to discuss a deal to ensure Mascherano’s freedom. The following is a transcript of that conversation.
After a year in captivity with limited contact to the outside world, former Barcelona goalkeeper Victor Valdes appears to have been released from whatever dungeon Manchester United have kept him in.
Valdes posted a message on his Instagram account thanking his fans for supporting him through this dark period of his life. The 34-year-old goalkeeper was first lured to the club with the promise of a chance to rehab his injured knee. He was then signed to a contract and dumped into their U-21 squad. He was able to escape to the first team twice, but was caught and banished back to his cell both times.
Last July, Valdes went on the football version of a hunger strike by refusing to play in a reserve match. As punishment, he wasn’t given a squad number, effectively making him disappear, despite being named to Man United’s Premier League squad presumably so no one would ask questions as to his whereabouts. He was also not invited to the club’s UNICEF charity dinner in November, proving the extreme lengths to his inhume treatment.
Valdes is now expected to join Belgian club Standard Liege, where he will attempt to reacclimate himself to footballing society.
As a tie-in to National Hug Day, which is apparently a thing, Liverpool cut together a video of 22 Jurgen Klopp hugs from his first three months with the club.
We recently came to the realization that Klopp’s hugs are sucking the life force out of his players, so with that in mind, this video goes from sweetly adorable to deeply troubling.
