Like some sort of violent tropical storm, 21-year-old Harry Kane is an unstoppable force of nature that is superior to humanity in every way. If his 29 goals in 43 appearances for Spurs this season left anyone unconvinced, Kane proved his omnipotence by scoring just 80 seconds into his England debut.
Tag: Dirty Tackle
Moldova keeper blasts clearance off Zlatan’s head for a goal
Such is the power of Zlatan Ibrahimovic that he can suck the ball towards his own head and score without even trying. He demonstrated this skill in Sweden’s match against Moldova, when the opposing keeper attempted a simple clearance but blasted the ball directly into Zlatan’s head instead, causing it it to ricochet back into his own net.
This gave Sweden a 1-0 lead in the 46th minute and proves that Zlatan is powerful enough to make you concede goals to him without even moving.
Zlatan later fired a laser beam of a penalty into the top corner to give Sweden a 2-0 win.
Euro qualifier halted after Russia goalkeeper gets hit with a flare
Seconds after the start of Montenegro’s Euro 2016 qualifier against Russia, goalkeeper Igor Akinfeev was hit in the back by a flare thrown from the stands. The Russian keeper was carted off and the match was suspended.
Wayne Rooney retires boxing celebration because his son mimicked it at school
Wayne Rooney provided the season’s most talked about goal celebration when he re-enacted getting knocked down by Phil Bardsley in his kitchen after scoring against Spurs. Now the Man United and England captain says he won’t be throwing anymore celebratory punches on the pitch since it’s proved a bad influence on his oldest son, five-year-old Kai.
Neymar scores from directly behind the goal in training
Normally when a footballer demonstrates their ability to score from “behind the goal,” they’re doing it just a step or two away from the endline and with plenty of room to curl he ball into the net. Neymar, however, is not most footballers.
While his teammates sat around during a training session before Brazil’s friendly at France, Neymar casually spun the ball in the net from directly behind the goal.
His teammates did not seem terribly impressed.
And against France, he managed to score from a slightly less difficult angle.
Nike covered Ricardo Quaresma’s car with tinfoil to promote Cristiano Ronaldo’s new boots

Cristiano Ronaldo has new, sparkling silver boots, and someone at Nike decided that covering every inch of Ricardo Quaresma’s car with CR7 branded tinfoil was the best way promote them. So they did.
A detective tries to keep Sepp Blatter from getting his grubby hands on the long-lost Jules Rimet Trophy

My latest private detective story for Howler Magazine* appears in the newly released issue seven and sees our mediocre investigator dragged into the search for the Jules Rimet Trophy — the original World Cup prize, which has been missed since 1983. Tony is forced to deal with a host of shady characters, including a pair of treacherous FIFA executives.
Though you should definitely pick up the new mag, you can read the story in full on Howler’s site.
And while you’re there, I highly recommend checking out DT contributor Ryan Bailey’s piece on the football rockstar you never saw, Robin Friday, as well!
*Previous cases involving Mario Balotelli and Jose Mourinho’s last days at Real Madrid appeared in issues two and four, respectively.
Backheel from distance sets up impressive volley in Greek match
Moments of perfection can occur at many different levels of the game and Greek amateur club Thyamis Kastriou proved this in their recent 4-0 win over Asteras Parapotamou.
The volley into the top corner of the net is wonderful enough, but the fact that it’s set up by a perfectly weighted looping backheel makes it rather incredible.
Thanks to Tolis from thesprotiaball.gr for the tip!
Leo Messi and 7-foot-7 Gheorghe Muresan pictured together at an NBA game
“Hola, Gheorghe” – Leo Messi #WizPacers pic.twitter.com/7VnZhZKdv5
— Monumental Network (@MonumentalNtwrk) March 26, 2015
In Washington, DC for Saturday’s friendly against El Salvador, the entire Argentina squad went to the Washington Wizards-Indiana Pacers NBA game on Wednesday night. This provided the opportunity for a truly delightful image: 5-foot-7 Lionel Messi shaking hands with 7-foot-7 former Wizards (then Bullets) center Gheorghe Muresan, the tallest player in NBA history.
The Wizards also presented Messi with the No. 10 jersey, eliciting mental images of the Argentine nutmegging opponents on the court with a basketball. And if you think Messi would be too small to compete in the NBA, remember that ex-Washington point guard Muggsy Bogues was just 5-foot-3. Read more
Nicklas Bendtner scores first international hat trick, shames the USA
Nicklas Bendtner scored a hat trick to help Denmark come from behind to beat the United States 3-2 in a friendly and now it’s all over.
