Author: Brooks Peck

Stomp or Score: A guide to playing football by Diego Costa

Chelsea striker Diego Costa has proven himself to be a master of infuriating his opponents and he does that with the frequent utilization of two key methods: scoring and stomping. Though he didn’t notch a goal in the second leg of Chelsea’s successful Capital One Cup semifinal against Liverpool, the Premier League’s top scorer was arguably the most impactful player on the pitch, infuriating the Liverpool players with his other tactic: the stomp.

He raised tensions early by retaliating against Emre Can for kicking the ball away from him with a stomp and then did the same later on when Martin Skrtel flailed his legs in the air to thwart a scoring chance.

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Santos Laguna’s Diego Gonzalez celebrates goal by using his boot as a phone and roping in a bystander

Diego Gonzalez contributed to Santos Laguna’s 4-1 win over Monterrey with a lovely seal header and then he immediately began his descent into insanity. The Argentine midfielder midfielder untied his shoe, took it off and went behind the goal. He held the boot up to his head like a telephone before sharing the imaginary call with a ball boy (or small teammate?) on the other side of the advertising board.

It’s unclear what the person/mythical beast on the other end of the boot phone said to them. Maybe it was a wrong number.

Uruguay mascot tries to sneak into Brazil U-20 team’s photo, gets pushed away

(SporTV)
(SporTV)

Brazil and Uruguay played a Sul-Americano U-20 match to a scoreless draw that ended with one of the Brazilian players proving that you can still cynically waste time even after getting sent off. But before the opening kick off brought all of that nonsense, the match was won by Uruguay’s mascot with the bold and ridiculous act of trying to sneak into Brazil’s team photo.

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Brazil U-20 time waster does terrible job of faking injury after getting sent off

In the final minutes of Brazil’s Sul-Americano U-20 match against Uruguay, Brazilian defender Wallace proved he is a terrible actor but excellent time waster.

The Braga center back, who is currently on loan at Monaco, was sent off after a late challenge. As he casually strolled off the pitch, he realized that Uruguay would have an advantage in the remaining seconds of the game and decided it was his duty to delay that inevitability as long as he possibly could. So, he stopped walking and laid down.

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DTotD: Morelia player gets tackled by the invisible man

Colombian midfielder Yorleys Mena came on in the 56th minute of Morelia’s Liga MX match against Leon on Friday. With the game still deadlocked at 0-0, Mena was eager to make his mark and got his chance when Morelia launched a counter attack after a Leon corner kick was foiled. With the ball at his feet and plenty of wide open space to roam, all Mena had to do was put in a cross to his streaking teammate for a clear shot on goal. Instead, he tripped over his own foot, and fell on top of the ball.

The match ended 0-0, but it remains unclear how Leon were able to register an invisible defender. In related news, Yorleys Mena has made it his life’s mission to ban invisible footballers from the game.

This has been the Dirty Tackle of the Day: a chronicling of unfortunate events. 

Barca supporting nun gets abused on Twitter for Cristiano Ronaldo comment

(Shalomtaller.info)
(Shalomtaller.info)

Sister Lucia Caram, an Argentine nun living in Catalonia loves FC Barcelona and, of course, Lionel Messi. This love is well known. In 2013, she told Mundo Deportivo that “not supporting Barca is a sin.” Though she describes the club as “a way of being, acting, living, thinking” and the embodiment of “fair play and humility,” she clearly has a sense of humor about football and doesn’t shy away from tongue in cheek comments, either.

And it is in that spirit that she boarded the Banter Bus and tweeted “Cristiano: Golden ball or fist?” after Cristiano Ronaldo got himself sent off during Real Madrid’s match against Cordoba on Saturday.

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Standard Liege supporters welcome back their Judas, Steven Defour, with decapitation tifo

Belgium international Steven Defour spent five years with Standard Liege, serving as the club’s captain for all but his first season with the club. He then spent three seasons with Porto, but returned to his homeland this season with Anderlecht — Standard’s fiercest rivals.

This did not go over so hot with his old club’s supporters. So when Defour returned to the Maurice Dufrasne Stadium wearing the wrong colors, the fans greeted him with a giant banner featuring a Jason Vorhees type holding a blood splattered machete in one hand and Defour’s severed head in the other, along with the words “RED OR DEAD.” It was subtle, but the message seemed to be that Defour is now dead to them.

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