It’s been a relatively nervy start to the season for Celtic. After winning four consecutive Scottish Premier League titles, the Bhoys currently sit five points behind perfect Aberdeen through seven matches. Naturally, this unfamiliar wasteland known as “Second Place” has everyone at the club sweating a little and that has apparently produced an unwanted odor around the main stand at Celtic Park.
DTotD: Luke Shaw suffers gruesome leg injury against PSV
So horrible this happening to any player. Feel so bad for Luke Shaw, he was playing so well. pic.twitter.com/MkkWCyWXoK
— ️ (@Routinho_) September 15, 2015
Early in the first half of Manchester United’s Champions League group-stage opener at PSV, Luke Shaw suffered a sickening leg injury (later confirmed to be a double fracture) resulting from a dangerous challenge by Hector Moreno.
Jose Mourinho does product placement for Google during press conference
Jose Mourinho is getting pointed questions from journalists and he doesn’t know why. As he says, he is still the champion of England (he — not his club — just him) despite Chelsea’s terrible start this season and others (ahem, ARSENE WENGER) have gotten much softer treatment, in his eyes, over much longer periods of underachievement.
“Some manager can’t be in difficult situations five, six, seven, 10 years and I am the current champion of England, why should I be in trouble?” he asked reporters at his press conference ahead of Chelsea’s Champions League opener against Maccabi Tel Aviv. “Why? I think that’s a good question and you don’t know what to answer.”
He then addressed the issue of what has been dubbed his “third season syndrome” where he either doesn’t stick around for one or underachieves if he does stay in a given job that long. Naturally, he sees this trend quite differently.
“My third season at Porto, I didn’t have a third season,” he said. “My third season in Inter, I didn’t have a third season. My third season at Chelsea the first time, I won the FA Cup and the Carling Cup and I played a Champions League semifinal. The third season in Real Madrid, I won the Super Cup, I lost the cup final, and I went to the Champions League semifinal. These are my third seasons. So click Google instead of make stupid question. Click Google and try to find.”
And it only got better from there. (Watch the video above for the full back and forth with the reporter who raised the issue.)
It’s unclear how much Google paid for this brilliant bit of product placement, but “Click Google instead of make stupid question” is a bold new slogan for the company.
Steven Gerrard tells the tale of requiring four stitches on his penis last year
Steven Gerrard has a new autobiography coming out, so excerpts from it are being released in the hopes of drumming up interest in the book. Of course, the best way to do that is with a story about a penis injury.
In January 2014, Gerrard suffered a horrific injury. I suggest you stop reading at this point, but I know you won’t.
Tim Sherwood does magic spell to make his two-goal lead disappear
With his side up 2-0 in the second half against undefeated Leicester City, Aston Villa manager Tim Sherwood attempted some kind of magic spell on the touchline (his version of a tactical adjustment) to prevent the home side from making a comeback. Except it totally backfired and Leicester ended up winning 3-2 with a trio of unanswered goals in the final 20 minutes of play.
Botafogo player produces an incomprehensibly awful corner kick
Players on loan are always eager to make an impression, but midfielder Tomas’ time at Botafogo will be remembered for the wrong reason. During a Brazilian Serie B match against Mogi Mirim, the 23-year-old on loan from J. Malucelli was tasked with taking a corner kick. It did not go well.
Kelechi Iheanacho: Man City’s low-priced match winner
After a summer in which Man City signed Kevin De Bruyne for £54 million, Raheem Sterling for £44 million, and even Patrick Roberts for £12 million, it was 18-year-old Kelechi Iheanacho, called up after a season in City’s youth setup, who scored the 90th-minute winner against Crystal Palace.
So who is the lesser known match winner standing out from the club’s expensive youthful acquisitions? Let’s take a look…
Christian Benteke, Anthony Martial score incredible goals back to back
It took a while to get going, but by the end of Manchester United’s 3-1 win against Liverpool, it felt like we all owed someone some money after watching two spectacular goals in a two-minute span.
Cristiano Ronaldo introduces his new fragrance “Buttloads of Goals”
Having endured an agonizing spell of two matches without scoring, Cristiano Ronaldo decided to go ahead and score five against Espanyol. He scored his initial hat trick within the first 20 minutes of the 6-0 win, then added two more in the second half for good measure.
Muhamed Besic’s hamstring joins campaign against Chelsea
Chelsea were all set to win at Everton and get their season on track after the international break. For nine minutes, the Toffees were completely shut down by Chelsea. Had it gone on for just a bit longer, they probably would have quit and handed Chelsea the three points just to avoid further frustration.
But then, in that moment of desperation, Muhamed Besic conveniently “injured his hamstring” and was replaced by Steven Naismith, a player nearly sold on transfer deadline day, who went on to score twice in five minutes and completed his hat trick in the second half. This gave Everton a shocking 3-1 win and Chelsea their third loss in five matches this season.