Tag: Werder Bremen

Papy Djilobodji banned for amusing throat slit gesture

Werder Bremen defender Papy Djilobodji (on loan from Chelsea) did the old pro wrestling face rake move on a Mainz opponent on Saturday and when the guy went to ground, he looked at the downed man and ran his finger across his throat because…I have no idea why.

Djilobodji was shown a yellow card during the match, but the referee missed this gesture, so the Bundesliga reviewed it and handed him a three-match ban.

Still, the question of why he did this in the first place remains. Was it pent-up aggression from spending so much time on Chelsea’s bench earlier this season? Was to signal his finishing move? Did the Mainz player make a disparaging remark about Leonardo DiCaprio’s performance in The Revenant? Who knows.

UPDATE: Djilobodji successfully appealed his punishment and got it reduced to a two-match ban and €15,000 fine. He likely accomplished this by staring down the DFB disciplinary board and making a throat slitting gesture.

The only correct opinion on Jordan Morris’ career choices

Jordan Morris is a 21-year-old striker who has played for the Seattle Sounder’s youth academy and Stanford University. He’s made seven appearances for the U.S. national team, scoring one goal against Mexico. U.S. fans and media have identified him as their next great hope and have become heavily invested in his career decisions as a result, benefitting no one.

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